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Many relationships are scattered because we fall in love with the wrong person. We may believe they are the right people for our lives, but we often end up losing and not feeling equally loved.
Some people fall in love with the wrong person not because they choose to, but situations like; lust, pressure, and money might be the causes of choosing the wrong partner for your life.
It is always proper to examine yourself, including choosing to put yourself first.
When you put yourself first, for example, what you want in life; you will be able to understand the type of man and woman you want to be with.
Although, you might not get the perfect man or woman, because life isn’t perfect itself. It is all about working things out together and making sure you strive to become better couples.
Why people are not loving you the way you love them
Love is reciprocal, it is totally fine if people don’t love you, and besides not everyone likes the person you are. Think about it this way: Did you know that people at the top of their careers often make enemies?
And if you find yourself in a situation where people are not returning the same love and energy you give to them it doesn’t mean that you are doing something wrong but maybe they aren’t feeling you as they ought to.
Also, These are some reasons why people may not reciprocate your love:
- You have a lot of fantasies
- You are self-centered
- You are impatient
- You dream of a perfect partner
- Trust issues
- You don’t understand them
- You don’t fit their standards
- You might be too available
- They see you as a friend
- You are not full of surprises
12 reasons why you fall in love with the wrong person
It is not your fault if you fall in love with the wrong person, as a matter of fact, a lot of us have fallen in love with someone who doesn’t match our energy.
In this article, we are going to look into why people fall in love with the wrong person and how to correct our mistakes with it.
1. They are desperate
Most times we let our feelings get the best of us, causing us to fall in love with someone who doesn’t care as much as we do about them. being desperate involves seeking the attention of someone you care deeply about. This makes the person you’re interested in lose value or will I say ‘romantic feelings’ for you.
Being desperate for someone is a major reason why people fall in love with the wrong person. Although, it is good to show love and concern for someone you care about. But when you begin to show so much need for the person, that is where it all goes wrong.
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2. They fall in lust
A significant reason people often fall in love with the wrong person is due to the influence of lust and desire. This is one of the reasons people are driven wrongly because of the idea of sex.
People choose sex over communication, respect, honesty, and trust. Don’t get me wrong about this; having a romantic feeling for someone is good, but when you prioritize it above all, you might end up falling for the person.
3. They have no connections
Having a connection with someone might involve mutual respect, sharing similar ideas, playing games together, and having future plans. This is what some people ignore and should be taken very seriously because, without a good connection, there is no happy relationship but only a toxic life.
Finding the right person means finding someone with great similarities. Haven’t you seen couples who always display great similarities such as having fun, sharing the same goals, and showing compassion for each other? These are good tributes to find in a relationship.
4. They fall for the money
Money has always been a major factor in a toxic relationship. Many people get it wrong when they look into material things over a good and healthy relationship.
Money is good, in fact, money is essential in a relationship. But in the case where you put money first in a relationship over a healthy relationship, you will get it wrong. You will be drawn to the person who might end up hurting you and making you feel less of yourself.
In other words, go for someone who shares common goals and ambitions with you. Chase your dreams together, then money will come. It is one of the best ways to grow in a relationship: growing together.
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5. They look for a perfect partner
There is nothing like ‘perfect’ in a relationship. You might always get what you want from your partner. A lot of people get it wrong by putting in the fantasy of having their dream man come through.
Dream man can come through, sure!
And you might not always see it instantly, because life cannot be sweet without the journeys. When you share your dreams and plans with your partner, you will begin to see your dreams come through as you go on with them.
So with that said, ‘A perfect partner’ cannot be instantly seen but experienced as you find your way in life.
6. They don’t have friendship qualities
Having a partner is like having a best friend. Certain qualities that make a friend which are;
- Good listener
- Supportive (emotional & physical)
- Trustworthy
- Respect your boundaries
- Cares about your well-being
- Fun to be with
These qualities are what makes a good friend and it should be the same qualities every partner must possess. Most times when a partner doesn’t exhibit these qualities someone else gives it to them, which could cause misunderstanding in a relationship.
Looking for someone who shares friendship qualities can be a good way to find the right person and avoid the wrong ones.
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7. They get moved by pressure
Another reason people fall in love with the wrong person is pressure. Having the pressure of getting someone right away because their friends are getting married or in a relationship. This could be caused by their families or friends telling them to do what they want them to do.
Falling in love involves being certain about the person you are with and having great qualities with the person. being under pressure is the wrong way to go when choosing a partner.
You should take your time to carefully choose a life partner, rather than rushing and ending up with the wrong person.
8. They don’t understand one another
Having a mutual understanding of one another is what builds a good relationship. People tend to fall in love with the wrong person because they lack a common interest – understanding.
When you are searching for a soulmate, you need to look into something you both share and love doing. You cannot be with someone who doesn’t show love and respect to you, in fact, it is highly toxic and forbidden in your health.
Rather find someone who understands you, even when you are wrong, and corrects you with love. Lack of understanding is what causes people to fall in love with the wrong person.
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9. They go for status
People fall in love with the wrong person because they chase glory, power, and respect. In today’s world, we find people forgetting the old romantic way of showing love and going for status.
Today, we have social media which has influenced the way we live and our culture. Making people chase fame, power, and attention. This could also involve chasing people’s status and relative positions just to make themselves seen.
10. They lack self-awareness
People who fall in love with the wrong people often lack self-awareness which involves knowing what they want because they don’t know what they want from someone they choose the wrong person for their lives which can be unhealthy.
You need to know what you want when choosing a partner. These can involve setting out the qualities you want in a man or a woman. This can bring about certainty to what you want in a relationship and life.
11. They are afraid of being alone
The fear of being alone can be a major of you falling in love with the wrong person. why should you be scared? The idea of fear is an illusion programmed in your mind that is not seen.
Everyone deserves happiness, even you.
You can also be in love, first by removing fear from your mind, and believing you can find true love. When you feel fear of being alone, you begin to rush into a relationship. In the worst sceneries, you choose whoever comes your way because you want to be in a relationship. which is bad for you!
12. They relate to their past lives
People let their past relationships affect their current lives with their partners, creating a negative thought that everyone is the same. Having a terrible past should not affect your current relationship. Instead, it should make you feel safe around them because someone is now here to make you feel better and loved than in your past life.
Remove that wrong impression of people because it only makes it harder for people to feel comfortable around you, which can chase people away from you.
Final thoughts
In conclusion, people often fall in love with the wrong person due to a combination of factors such as desperation, lust, lack of connection, and prioritizing money or status over genuine compatibility. Rushing into relationships, succumbing to pressure, and a lack of self-awareness or fear of being alone can also lead to poor romantic choices.
Additionally, unrealistic expectations of finding a perfect partner and letting past relationships influence current ones can negatively impact one’s love life.
Understanding these reasons can help individuals make better choices in their relationships and avoid repeating the same mistakes.
