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Most red flags in an abusive relationship are visible to you, and you don’t need someone to tell you. On the other hand, people try to ignore these red flags found in their relationship to avoid losing their partners.
It is important to deal with everything that makes you uncomfortable in your relationship; it is also important that you tell your partner what is bothering you that needs fixing.
Imagine living to please your partner while you suffer the toxic behavior because you don’t want to risk losing them. Understanding and caring for one another is vital as it defines a “relationship.”
What is the meaning of a relationship?
A relationship connects two people in ways that bring understanding, love, trust, respect, empathy, and shared emotions. One should be able to deal with, show up to solve their partner’s problem, and create understanding with one other; that is what makes a good and healthy relationship.
Red flags for a new relationship
In most relationships, love and lust blind people in new relationships from seeing the red flags. Most red flags are obvious at first sight, and you must make careful decisions about them.
Another way to know a red flag from your partner is to trust your instincts. If they seem to be going off and behaving in ways you don’t like, then you should avoid them before they bring physical and emotional harm to you.
In this blog, we will see the red flags in a relationship set to cause danger and destruction to your life. You must also avoid these types of people and trust your instincts on them.
Red flags in abusive relationships to look out for immediately
1. Controlling behavior
being in a relationship requires working together as a couple, not being controlled and manipulated by your partner or their families. When your partner is controlling, you begin to see these threats in your relationship;
- You don’t have a voice in the relationship
- Your partner treats you as insignificant
- You feel emotional and physical harm from your partner, which can lead you to low self-esteem and depression.
All these controlling behaviors are unhealthy signs of a relationship. Have a partner who can love, honor, support, and value you in a relationship with their friends and families.
2. Trust issues
Trust issues can be a red flag in a relationship because they indicate a lack of communication and security. The moment your partner stops showing trust, you will begin to feel neglected, emotionally, and physically abused by them. Trust keeps the bond in the relationship strong and healthy; that’s why couples live 20 to 50 years in a relationship because they trust each other and share their secrets.
Gaslighting is a red flag in an abusive relationship and is considered to be inappropriate for your health. When your partner involves manipulating you emotionally and making you doubt yourself and feel uncomfortable, you should consider it a red flag, and you shouldn’t be in that kind of relationship.
4. Constant misunderstanding
Resolving conflicts in a relationship is what makes the relationship strong and healthy. But the moment you and your partner constantly argue, begin to develop hate for each other, and you see no light in the tunnel, I think it better that you cut all ties to the relationship because all you will do is keep hurting each other every time.
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5. Love bombing
Love bombing in a relationship is a red flag and should be avoided when you have such a partner. This is a form of emotional manipulation whereby your partner does whatever they can to get what they want, and you might end up losing yourself and hating your friends and families all because you are on the side of your partner, who emotionally manipulates you.
6. Doesn’t respect other people
There is a saying: to be given respect, you need to respect people. When you are caught up with a partner who doesn’t show respect for people, whether an elderly person, a waiter, or even your family, it is most likely that they can’t respect you.
You should find someone who shows respect for people and values everyone equally because only that can you see someone who can respect and value you.
7. Living a fake life
When you are living with someone who doesn’t show you their real personality, then that is a red flag in a relationship.
Living a fake life means the person isn’t honest and trustworthy with you, which is unhealthy.
You don’t want to be living with someone who lies about themselves, whether it is their background, feelings, achievement, or personal identity. Also, note that living with this kind of people carries a lot of risk.
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8. Bad body grooming
As the bible says, cleanliness is next to godliness. A partner who doesn’t care for themselves is living unhealthily, which can affect your relationship.
You need a partner who represents themselves well, like cleaning their homes, cutting their hair, using body deodorants, taking regular showers, and having a partner who can groom himself properly. You don’t want to be living with an unclean person in your home who doesn’t know how to take of themselves.
9. Overly jealous
Having an overly jealous person in a relationship can bring you a lack of trust and comfort. When your partner is jealous, they can be controlling and monitoring sometimes because of a lack of trust and respect for you, which could be scary and frustrating.
Most times, to fix these kinds of people, you need to make amends with them by having a conversation and opening up to them, and making them understand. This way, you can bring your partner love, trust, and intimacy.
10. They don’t take you out
When your partner doesn’t take you out on a date or with their friends, it signifies a red flag in a relationship. This could be that your partner is hiding something from you and could mean they don’t want to spend quality time with you, which could lead to feeling unappreciated and insignificant in their lives.
You need a partner ready to share every moment with you, with his friends and family, and for the world to see as well. A partner who can appreciate every moment with you and make you feel valued and respected in the relationship.
11. Physical and emotional abuse
Physical and emotional abuse in a relationship can be a red flag because your partner might be threatening to hurt you or manipulating you in ways that make you feel useless in the relationship. These red flags can make you feel depressed and can also bring a lot of bad side effects to your life in ways that make you feel not wanted.
It is also important to find happiness in your relationship the moment you feel physically and emotionally abused; you should reconsider your thoughts in your relationship before it gets worse.
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12. Lack of support
In a relationship, your partner should care and value your interest. When your partner isn’t supporting and encouraging you in the relationship, it could mean they aren’t feeling you anymore.
Lack of support can make you feel resented and lonely in the relationship and can greatly affect you.
You should have a partner who listens and shows every bit of appreciation for what you do in your life.
13. They don’t respect your boundaries
In a relationship, it is important to put your partner in the picture and consider their feelings because you love and trust them, and there are certain boundaries we keep that shouldn’t be tampered with.
Your boundaries are personal feelings and mental well-being, and a partner should respect and understand your boundaries because they love and care about you.
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14. Negative instincts
When you begin to sense something off about your partner or in the relationship, it is important to trust your instincts because they were put in your subconscious mind for a reason.
Most times, people ignore their instincts and trust what they see and hear from their partners, which is not bad but could be deceiving sometimes. It is good to look inward and check what you are feeling; if there is anything that needs fixing and attention from your partner, you should take action.
Final thoughts on red flags in a relationship
In as much as we are in a relationship, we do have ups and downs in a relationship, but there are some red flags that we shouldn’t ignore that can be abusive, manipulative, depressing, and controlling.
Red flags in a relationship should be treated and not be dismissed at all, that is why I have listed out the red flags in a relationship whether you are about to enter a new relationship with your partner or you’re in a relationship, you shouldn’t ignore these red flag signs in a relationship.